I tend to control too much in my life as well, as a result my mind refuses to rest and accept peace if a challenge comes up.
However, I truly believe that there is wisdom in silence. I have recently started being more conscious of slowing down when life throws unexpected twists and turns at me.
You’ve put it so beautifully through your words here.
I love this poem, and I feel it inspiring a poem in me. I've had horrible eye sight ever since I was a kid, and so at night while trying to sleep the shadows were extra menacing since they lacked definition and I couldn't figure out what was casting the shadow. I also had frequent nightmares and night terrors.
I love the way you only use italics for the first half of the second stanza. It makes the end seem like such a forceful, passionate declaration.
Thanks Jason, I hope you’ll share whatever this inspires!
Interesting callout about the change in italics. I went back and forth between making the statement a separate stanza, leaving it all in italics, and doing what I settled on. It’s the one part of the poem I’m not sure I’m content with...
I’ve always struggled with poetry, thinking that inspiration will take over and I’ll be left with something beautiful in mere minutes. It never really works out that way, takes a lot more work. It’s refreshing to see how many steps you go through to reach that beauty!
Thank you Abby! Every now and again a poem just comes out, but I think the consistency of writing, even the times where it takes a lot of work, are what set up the moments where things flow. And even the poems that take a while can turn into something truly beautiful.
You make a great point re: "perhaps just sitting in the moment, noticing the lies in our mind, and seeing the truth in front of us are where peace and contentment lie." That second part about the truth being in front of us and containing peace and contentment is well-put.
It's taken me decades to realize this and it's something I work on daily. It has helped the past few years though with things like walking in Nature, photography, and my own writing and poetry.
Hey Brian. I was reluctant to comment on your first work even though I found it woven beautifully with imagery. At first I thought someone had been lost and was waiting a return. Appreciate the backstory! My wife struggles with insomnia. Finding that rhythm of your body is sure a thing. Hope things are settling. Thanks for the read, Brian!
Finding beauty, ever-present, in the midst of every moment-- that's the task we're always trying to accomplish. But, wow, sleep deprivation makes that so difficult. I'm living this poem, too, Brian. When I wake up in the night, which is often lately, I try to tend to my body's comfort first (drink some water, etc.) then I just try to breathe slowly, relax, and "pretend to sleep." I tell myself I don't actually have to fall asleep. I've also been experimenting with much less screen time. Not sure if it's been helpful.
In any case, I'm thankful for your candlelight writing sessions. It seems like a good bargain to trade a few fleeting hours in the middle of the night for creating a beautiful poem that will now last forever.
Thanks Ann, that is very kind. I like the gentleness in which you described “pretending to sleep” and the permission not to fall sleep. I’m sure that helps the body and mind relax, and take the pressure off, and in turn helps you fall asleep... At least sometimes🙂
Thank you for reading and sharing! The body is amazing. I think for me part of the learning is to hold on to resilience while also listening to and honoring the body.
I tend to control too much in my life as well, as a result my mind refuses to rest and accept peace if a challenge comes up.
However, I truly believe that there is wisdom in silence. I have recently started being more conscious of slowing down when life throws unexpected twists and turns at me.
You’ve put it so beautifully through your words here.
Mandi, I’m glad it resonated with you! Thanks for reading!
I love this poem, and I feel it inspiring a poem in me. I've had horrible eye sight ever since I was a kid, and so at night while trying to sleep the shadows were extra menacing since they lacked definition and I couldn't figure out what was casting the shadow. I also had frequent nightmares and night terrors.
I love the way you only use italics for the first half of the second stanza. It makes the end seem like such a forceful, passionate declaration.
Thanks Jason, I hope you’ll share whatever this inspires!
Interesting callout about the change in italics. I went back and forth between making the statement a separate stanza, leaving it all in italics, and doing what I settled on. It’s the one part of the poem I’m not sure I’m content with...
I will definitely share it when I have something
I’ve always struggled with poetry, thinking that inspiration will take over and I’ll be left with something beautiful in mere minutes. It never really works out that way, takes a lot more work. It’s refreshing to see how many steps you go through to reach that beauty!
Thank you for sharing, definitely inspiring to me
Thank you Abby! Every now and again a poem just comes out, but I think the consistency of writing, even the times where it takes a lot of work, are what set up the moments where things flow. And even the poems that take a while can turn into something truly beautiful.
In the tempo of the telling I can feel the flickering on my eyes.
Thanks Weston. Your comment is a poem itself...
You make a great point re: "perhaps just sitting in the moment, noticing the lies in our mind, and seeing the truth in front of us are where peace and contentment lie." That second part about the truth being in front of us and containing peace and contentment is well-put.
It's taken me decades to realize this and it's something I work on daily. It has helped the past few years though with things like walking in Nature, photography, and my own writing and poetry.
Thanks for commenting and being here. It’s a lifelong practice. Most things are!
Peace is found in the dark.
It takes some practice, but it’s there!
Hey Brian. I was reluctant to comment on your first work even though I found it woven beautifully with imagery. At first I thought someone had been lost and was waiting a return. Appreciate the backstory! My wife struggles with insomnia. Finding that rhythm of your body is sure a thing. Hope things are settling. Thanks for the read, Brian!
Finding beauty, ever-present, in the midst of every moment-- that's the task we're always trying to accomplish. But, wow, sleep deprivation makes that so difficult. I'm living this poem, too, Brian. When I wake up in the night, which is often lately, I try to tend to my body's comfort first (drink some water, etc.) then I just try to breathe slowly, relax, and "pretend to sleep." I tell myself I don't actually have to fall asleep. I've also been experimenting with much less screen time. Not sure if it's been helpful.
In any case, I'm thankful for your candlelight writing sessions. It seems like a good bargain to trade a few fleeting hours in the middle of the night for creating a beautiful poem that will now last forever.
Thanks Ann, that is very kind. I like the gentleness in which you described “pretending to sleep” and the permission not to fall sleep. I’m sure that helps the body and mind relax, and take the pressure off, and in turn helps you fall asleep... At least sometimes🙂
so love seeing your notebooks ✍🏻
And I so love seeing your comments! Thanks for reading!
Thank you for reading and sharing! The body is amazing. I think for me part of the learning is to hold on to resilience while also listening to and honoring the body.